The School Play

Last night was the school play.  A whole bunch of little ones from toddlers to senior kindergarteners, clustered on a tiny stage singing and dancing--well, doing something with their arms and legs, perhaps calling it dancing is a bit of a stretch--and being tremendously cute, while all us eager parents clamoured for a decent spot to take a priceless photo or video of the precious little darlings displaying their remarkable talent.  Of course, my kid was the best singer, dancer and all-round performer, and by far the absolute cutest.  To be honest, I couldn't tell you what the other kids did because my eyes were glued on her. 

Sad thing was, she was stuck behind other kids and way on the far side of the stage so we could barely see her.  And the school made a huge muck up of the event by having more people attend than they could accommodate and thus deciding at the very last minute to have two shows.  Rumour had it someone called the Fire Marshall and the school was threatened with fines if they allowed too many people in the hall.  And to top it off, the grandparents and great grandparents had to leave after the first show, I couldn't find my little giraffe, so they never got to see each other.  First thing my disheveled safarian said to me was, "Where's Nana?  Did she see me?  Where's Nana!?"  Disappointment.  Huge.  For all of us. 

Are my expectations too high?  Is it too much to expect the school would check fire regulations?  Can't they insist tickets are pre-bought?  Am I being too demanding to think the school should have sent an email telling us when to bring the kids, what the kids needed to wear, where to drop them off and pick them up, without me having to call and ask?  And lastly, if I were to call and complain and bring to light the myriad mistakes the school made in putting on this performance--one they apparently do every year--would anyone give a rat's arse what I think.  Probably not.

But the sparkly giraffe had fun and has been singing her song all day.  Perhaps I should take a lesson from a 3 3/4 year old in seeing the bright side of things....

Confessions of a Food Addict

Several months ago, I did it--I achieved my "goal weight" by losing about thirty pounds (also known as 16 kilos).  After years of being pregnant and breastfeeding, the old physique was looking rough and flabby, so I joined a gym, a diet program, learned how to eat again, and lost the unwanted weight.  

Man, was I hot!  Skinny jeans took on a whole new meaning because I was, well, skinny!  My clothes were so big on me they were no longer wearable and I had to buy low single digit sizes. Gone were my chubby face and arms, replaced with chiselled features and muscle definition.  Even my legs were bearable, and I have always hated my legs.  I never knew I could ever look like this.  It was totally awesome!

I thought, "Great!  Problem solved!  Weight lost!  Next challenge, please!"

Shortly before moving to Canada, my food addiction reared its ugly head and the bingeing started.  Eating anything and everything in sight, I would make myself feel sick on the sheer volume of junk--cookie dough, nuts, peanut butter, cookie dough, chocolate, sugary cereals, pasta, cookies, donuts and did I mention cookie dough?  I managed to keep my weight reasonably under control so I could fit (just) into my new thin clothes.  When we got to Canada, the bingeing continued to where I gained back at least 20 pounds and pushed myself into the "overweight" range again.  Back into the fat clothes that I had ominously kept--maybe I knew the new body wasn't to stay???  Bingeing was certainly nothing new to me, but it had never gone on this long.  My food addiction was at its worst.

It's not like I didn't know heaps about nutrition, because I did, but I seemed to have lost all control over the food I was eating and couldn't keep myself "in the zone" of healthy eating.  Desperate times called for desperate measures--enter weight loss hypnosis.  Professional hypnosis isn't in the financial cards, so I am started listening to a few online recordings to see what effect it has.  God bless YouTube.

Worst case scenario--I have a relaxing 15 minutes in the middle of my day. 

Best case--I can beat my food addiction by changing the negative and screwed up way I think about food, get thin again and feel awesome! 

And with any luck, break the food addiction cycle so my girls don't grow up using food as a reward, a punishment, a comfort, a medicine, a treat, a consolation, a drug.